The Many Lives of Miki Sayaka
by Element-of-Fabulosity
Summary: Miki Sayaka was a perfectly normal girl whose best friend was Kaname Madoka. Or Sakura Kyoko. Or Momoe Nagisa. And let's not forget the times she wasn't a normal girl at all...K plus for mild descriptions of blood, spoilers for Rebellion.


Sayaka glanced up from doodles of _Kamijo Sayaka_ to watch the transfer student shakily write her name- _Akemi Homura_ \- for all to see.

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Sayaka glanced up from doodles of _Kamijo Sayaka_ to watch the transfer student whirl around, dark hair flaring out behind her. _Akemi Homura,_ the board announced for all to see.

"I think I met her before...in a dream or something," Madoka said. Hitomi sipped her tea. Sayaka guzzled.

"...or something? What's that supposed to mean?" Sayaka asked.

"You may have met her before in passing," Hitomi suggested. "Your conscious mind forgot, while your subconscious mind took note. Then later, she resurfaced in your dream."

"Whatever," Sayaka muttered. "You're so _moe._ "

.

Sayaka scanned the shelves at the music store. She picked up a headset and put it on. A catchy pop tune played- no, that was too mainstream. Kyosuke wouldn't care for it.

"Madoka?" Sayaka asked. Her friend tore the headphones off her head, looking around frantically. She ran out.

Sayaka all but dropped the headphones and ran after her.

.

Magical girls and witches, fairies and wishes for anything in the world. It was so much.

She could wish for Kyosuke's arm to be healed.

All thoughts of hundred-course meals vanished. She could picture him playing his violin again, lighting up the room with his smile. No more hospitals. He'd thank her for being there for him. He'd say it was like a miracle.

It would definitely be worth it.

.

Oktavia von Seckendorff raised her hands. The orchestra paused, and all noise ceased. Kyoko clasped her hands in prayer. Oktavia slashed downward. The orchestra responded, trumpets and drums and violins crashing in symphony with Kyoko's imploding soul.

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Sayaka glanced up from doodling to watch the transfer student write her name- _Akemi Homura-_ with a perfectly steady hand for all to see. Then she looked back down, and added the final scale to her armored mermaid.

.

Hitomi dreamt of many things. Scarlet threads and disappearing sundays. Patchwork skies and puppetmaster teddy bear _(witch, wraith)_ Nightmare. A boy playing a violin. Sayaka was not jealous. Kamijo Kyosuke was her friend and nothing more. And Sayaka was a raspberry.

.

Kyoko got home unusually late one night. Sayaka was almost afraid to ask. "Did something happen with Homura?"

"Eh?" Kyoko asked. "How'd you know?"

 _Lucky guess._ "I'm going out. Don't wait up for me."

.

The sky lit up with gunfire and magic, and Sayaka knew Homura remembered.

"Targeting Bebe just because she used to be a witch?" Sayaka asked. She clicked her tongue.

She could feel Homura's stare. "You...remember?"

"That's why I'm here." Sayaka turned. Merely telling Homura didn't work; she had to show her the facts and wait for her to draw the right conclusion.

"You're saying the one who trapped us in here is one of us?"

 _And there it is._ "Would it be so surprising if it was? Mami was just saying this is the happiest she's ever been. And when you find the witch, you'll what- kill her?"

"Don't tell me you're siding with a witch!"

If only you knew, Sayaka thought. "Go figure. I used to be one." She kicked at the puddles and thought of the last time she was in this alley. Diamond lattice and a flash of crimson rushing at her. "We don't have to kill anyone. We can keep fighting together. Is the person who created such a world really so evil?"

Homura didn't answer. "I just remembered a crucial point. There are three people who shouldn't exist: the witch who created this labyrinth, Bebe, who resembles a witch, and you, who used to be a witch. Who are you, Miki Sayaka?!"

"I'm the same old Sayaka you've always known, transfer student."

Then Sayaka remembered her despair.

.

Mitakihara slipped and cracked. The sky melted and burned. The last fragments of pretense at a normal city fell away. Sayaka watched Homulilly with resignation. "Don't be afraid," she told Mami. "She looks scary, but she's the one who's hurting the most."

She closed her eyes. _Hitomi's ultimatum: the impossible choice. Confess to Kyosuke, or I will. How could she confess when she was worse than a monster-?_

Remember the hurt. The pain _Shouting at Madoka, who only wanted to help- she was an awful friend, an awful person-_ Remember the despair _The final straw, blood on her cutlass and staining the train, human blood_ she killed a person, not a wicked witch but a person-

Sayaka drove her cutlass through herself. Something split.

 _Sayaka's soul turned black. Oktavia von Seckendorff rose from the ashes. Oh, how she hated herself, but perhaps she could redeem the tiniest sliver. She raised the spear that once destroyed her towards Homulilly._ Sayaka's soul was untainted, cleansed by the fragment of the Law of the Cycles she kept within herself.

.

She wanted to laugh as she and Nagisa revealed _everything_ to the incubators. "You were so focused on Madoka, it was easy to slip by." The brilliant, simple plan Madoka saw would work.

.

"I had an awful dream last night," Kyoko said. "You were dead. But that wasn't a dream, was it? That was real, and this is the dream."

Sayaka couldn't deny it. "I thought I had no regrets when Madoka took me away. The truth is...I guess I did have one."

The rest didn't need saying. Kyoko and Sayaka threw themselves into the battle to fight together one last time.

.

A speck of light shot up from the epicenter of the battle, and everything shattered.

.

Sayaka and Nagisa rode in a whimsical carriage pulled by the last of Charlotte's familiars. "This is the end, I guess," Sayaka said. "I'm glad I got to see Kyoko one last time."

"I'm happy I met Mami," Nagisa agreed. "And I ate cheese again!"

Sayaka rolled her eyes. "Shh! It's about to happen!"

The Law of the Cycles smiled down at Homura. "You waited for me, all this time!" She reached for Homura's hands. "Come on, let's go."

"You don't know how long I've waited...for this moment."

The world exploded into horrible colors Sayaka didn't even have a name for.

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Sayaka glanced up from nonsensical doodles to watch the transfer student write her name- _Kaname Madoka-_ for all to see.

The transfer student felt familiar, like Sayaka had met her before. But that was impossible. "Hey Nagisa, do you want to hit the music store on the way home?"

"As long as we go to the bakery too!"

.

Sayaka dreamt of an orchestra. Black feathers fell from the sky. She dreamt of a mermaid and a unicorn and alleyways with red latticework. A world where nightmares are vanquished with a song friends sing together, and colors without names.

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A white creature watched her with unblinking eyes. " _Miki Sayaka, do you want to change the world?"_

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 **I realized as I was posting this that I forgot to write a section for the end of the anime. oh well. I hope to write a nagisa companion piece.**

 **formatting issues fixed!**


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